consider the lilies*

they are, well, plants. they do not move, nor speak, nor can they defend themselves against loads of things. maybe some parasites, and that only because they have this chemistry going inside themselves. that all said, lilies come in various shapes and sizes, fragrances and  colours. they are tall and  royally white or purple like the […]

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good friday 2014

this is a world full of things that should not be. hate, betrayal, pain, suffering, affliction…plain stupidity and lack of love… and the more humanity wants to remove the ‘superfluous’ and ‘false’ god and oppression of organised religion, and stand on its own, the less of the world seems to be right. plenty of people […]

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and so here is the dream: in my dream, i sleep, and beryl the cat sleeps next to me in three columns, justified. with a little quotation in a frame somewhere in the middle of the page. to the music of “erbarme dich’ from st. Matthew’s passion by Bach. … illustrious.

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not the big things

the big things in life are easy to deal with: they chunk together and stand proud; they can be hit – or missed. they either crush one, or make one taller. the big things, the landmark decisions, the global pain, the ultimate losses are easy. it is the small things that are difficult to manage. […]

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beryl the cat spends two hours trying to wake me up. only to fall purringly asleep when i do (get up) and start working. on my arms, as i type. figures.

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different lucidity

they say – and i have seen it actually – there is a moment of lucidity before the final departure. the whole of today is torn by flashbacks. of pictures of sudden bursts of coherence and actual joy when my mother spoke like she was better. of the little flutter of hope. and then, the […]

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